Investments

I can tell you without exaggerating that the kwoon does literally hold my blood, sweat and tears somewhere in some form. If find that a fairly significant fact for me. It tells me that I have a lot invested into my training; time and effort and everything in between.

There have been times where I've wanted to walk away from it all, thinking life would be much simpler, much easier and less stressful if I did. No one to be accountable to, no one noticing how much I did or didn't practice, no one to answer to when I make dumb decisions. But I've never left. Once I started thinking along those lines I started getting scared, wondering. If I were truly honest with myself, how far would I let myself slide in life?

Not saying that I feel I'd turn into some horrible person. But I know I'd be a less awesome person. I wouldn't be reminded to be active. I wouldn't have the confidence to stand up for myself. I wouldn't have the desire to be kind.

It's a slippery slope. Once you skip that first class, the second is easier, it doesn't matter so much. Once you miss a day of push ups it's harder to complete them the next day. Why does it seem that it's always easy to fall down and so hard to pick yourself up?

Skipping that class or that meeting or those pushups do not relieve the stress. It does not make life easier, simpler or better in any shape, way or form. Completing those push ups make me feel better. Being at class relieves the stress I feel, gives me structure and desire to accomplish great things. All those investments I mentioned, they'll pay off if given the chance.

I'm glad to back on the team. See you where the grass is greener.