Gizmo

At first impression Gizmo may have come across as a mop head but once you stepped closer you'd realize that there was a rowdy dog in the middle of the floor, with a personality all his own and an attitude to match.

My parents said goodbye to Gizmo this past Wednesday. This was the dog that never feared the cat, who was ring bearer at our wedding and who, in the end, wouldn't let blindness and cushings disease keep him away from the food bowl or my mothers side.

It's always the stars that shine the brightest that fade the fastest. Rest well Shmo. May the carrots be plentiful in your garden.

Horizons

I feel I've learned this year through teaching and my own practice that what we do has to be a state of mind, not just physical skill. You have to flip a switch if you want to get everything you can out of this and that switch affects everything you do. If, for instance, you don't put your full potential into your form you'll miss so much it has to offer. If you don't put any effort into your sound focus how can you expect your body to not follow suit and still give its potential? Each time you go half way it means you left half on the table and said to yourself, thats good enough. You robbed yourself of a chance to progress. If you perpetually flip that switch then it becomes mindless, effortless effort as it's been defined, and putting your full energy into everything becomes easy and normal. And then your potential grows.

I think this is what the IHC has taught me. Reaching your potential doesn't have to be a painful, mind numbing experience. Of course it takes hard work, but if you dedicate yourself to the pursuit then the work becomes easy, and with a little mindful maintenance your frame of mind supports the physical aspects. I'm still working on this.

I don't see that I'll ever reach my potential, not as long as I keep trying to advance. It's like the horizon, it always moves further ahead the closer I get. I need to accept this but I still need to try.

Cedar & Cher

Looking back on my blog dates I realized how much the ball is dropped. I knew I was behind but it had gotten away from me worse than I thought.

I can't say I have much for a reason but I have plenty of excuses. We've been spending every spare moment drywalling, painting, installing cedar ceilings, sealing the wood, installing trim, and today getting the floor installed in the hall and bedroom. So I could say my focus has shifted. I don't want to say my priorities have changed, rather they have been added to. But, if I'm honest, it has just been lack of discipline. I've had the time and ability just without the followthrough. The aforementioned are excuses, not reasons.

I have been journaling, but privately for a change. I've been carrying on what my mother started decades ago and I'm writing in the same journal she wrote for me when I was a baby, but obviously I'm writing to my own unborn pups. It's a different experience, and I'm excited and scared spitless at the same time.

I've been regretting not establishing a stronger schedule or regime when I had the chance. I feel that it would have been such a benefit to me now to have the practice and the skills that would have been better developed. I could have made it serve be better but didn't. Such is the theme regarding many of my requirements- most still works in progress, few fully accomplished. If only I had superpowers like Sifu S. Csillag I'd turn back time.