I know we all have our own struggles and obstacles in our lives. We’re all on different paths and at different points. But I keep learning and relearning one thing- there is more to the phrase “out of the kwoon and into the world” than any of us give it credit for. Listening to the questions and the comments on Wuxin this past week got me digging deeper and ultimately lead me to an epiphany of sorts.
Wuxin when dealing with my kids. I need to train more to help fix my parenting problems.
It is impossible to be fully objective and to take away emotion when dealing with my kids. We’re mirrors of each other; Sydney gets mad, I get mad. I get frustrated, Carter is frustrated. Someone gets hurt, my heart hurts for them.
What I need is the ability to recognize these emotions for what they are and empathize with them, not react to my own. Why is Carter so mad? Because he wants something that I won’t give him and he’s frustrated that he’s powerless. He’s a toddler who has not yet learned to temper his emotions with reason. He’s a big ball of reaction.
As I said, we’re mirrors.
The more I train the more in tune with my body, my ability and my energy I become. I recognize more faster. I gain control of myself, I see more clearly, I’m more cognizant.
The more I train the calmer and more confident I become.
The better I empathize.
Tantrums are inevitable, but I have the ability to stop throwing gas on the fire. Easier said than done? Heck yes. But, as with Kung Fu, practice makes progress. And that’s all we’re striving for, isn’t it?
Oh, and well rounded, capable, confident, self-loving and self sustaining children.
Seriously, how do you keep your sanity?
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